Is your private life letting you down?  Your public life has raised the bar too high?  We are all familiar with this scenario.  Think of a celebrity or politician.  Person becomes famous then plummets morally in private but is exposed publicly then becomes more famous.  Oh the insanity!
 
How are these 2 facets of ourselves linked, meshed or maybe separate?
 
Public life – the carefully crafted image we exude.  The impeccably turned out family, sleek car, immaculate desk etc.
 
Private life – the life of chaos, dirty laundry, overdue bills, over-tired kids etc. 
 
Believe it or not, everyone is not what they appear to be.  Some people may dread their co-workers, friends or family finding out their dirty little secret - they are not perfect and not always on top of everything!
 
Thank goodness!  Now we all know we are not alone!
 
We may cultivate either or both personas, consciously or unconsciously depending on what we desire to identify with or as.  I am not even going to go down the relationship side of this debate.  But either way, it is what it is.
 
One of the final questions is this:  Does the separateness or togetherness of both the public and private add to your life or take away from it?  For you and your sense of contentment, no one else’s.  This could appear selfish but consider this – if you are calmer, more confident and pleased with the balance you maintain then chances are so are those around you and hopefully they will take from your example.

Confused?  You should be, but I will explain my madness.  In my mind, my madness is pure logic, so here goes.

As the end of the holiday period approaches everything shifts (marketing wise) to the new year. Inevitably, that means being inundated with good will messages regarding new year's resolutions. Commercials, articles, conversations etc. about everyone's forthcoming resolutions that will ultimately change their life course by the end of January.

I for one am finding it rather tiring.  Not the actual plans to improve our lives but the constant unrealistic one-upmanship that seems to become more of the focus.

Do you find that it's all too easy to become discouraged and then knowing that the milestone of a new year is 10 or 11 months away leads to the subconscious decision to do nothing?

So, in aid of all this do-nothingness, Sunday has become my new year. Not in a Hollywood Life Changing Moment just in a Let's plan a bit and ease the week in beforehand kind of way.

Time to re boot for the week ahead.  Making sure the groceries for the week are in so there are fewer pit stop shopping trips can be incredibly helpful.  I hate remembering, at 1:30 am, that I have no fruit for my kids lunches the next day.  Or that I forgot to pay a bill so now I have screwed up my credit rating for 6 months.
Ringing any bells?  I'm sure I'm not the only one.  I can't be!  I refuse to believe I am.

Laundry -ugh.  Help me Rhonda.  It just never ends.  I have tried various methods, more clothes, fewer clothes, one load a day, one day with many loads...
It seems to change with our weekly schedule but I do try and have it ready for Monday morning.  Then like the groceries, it's a no brainer for the week.  

Menu planning is another life- easer for me. I'm not overly fond of this term as I feel it implies a certain level of professionalism that I am not up to.  I don't get crazy over it, no multiple course meals or incredibly restrictive recipes that I only have 2 of the ingredients for.  When I'm doing my groceries this comes into play.  Another boon I have recently discovered (it takes me awhile), is grocery delivery.

AWESOME!  Now before you start reeling about the delivery fee, think for a moment.  No browsing, means less spending.  You stick to your list so you actually end up saving money and for someone with a hectic schedule this is easily off set by the nominal delivery fee.  Success.  

Back to my original point about grocery delivery is that I can take my time when it's convenient for me and think about 3 or 4 meals I would like to make during the up coming week.  It's so easy to then buy everything you need and if you forget something, you don't need to walk back 3 aisles, it's just a few finger taps away.

An added bonus is that if you live in a flat, walk-up or have a bad back there is no lifting, shifting, dropping or breaking.

So, every Sunday - or whatever time in the week fits the bill for you, is a moment to think about the upcoming week and decide on 2 or 3 things you can do that will make your week easier for you.  I have shared the things that help me right now with my life, this is very subjective.  Think about your needs, your family's needs for the week ahead.  A year is too big of a chunk to be realistic for me, one week is my max.  

Some other helpfuls for my week:

hard boil eggs for the week's lunches
prep kids schoolwork that I help them with (not homework but extras that we do)
ironing - sometimes
vitamins in the daily vitamin boxes
fill in my calendar/phone with the week's commitments
clean out your purse
charge all devices

Please do not try and do a marathon Sunday of endless prep for the next 6 days.  Choose 2 or 3 only and just try and stick to them.  

If you fall off the wagon mid week then refresh your mind and continue - giving up is self-defeating.  Just move on and help yourself.  If your re boot day has to be observed again mid week, so be it.  No rules, no failings, no judgement - it's about making things easier not harder.

If you have any ideas you'd like to share that help you get through the week - please do.

A Favourite quote, Winston Churchill - "If you're going through hell, keep going..."

​Custodian as in guardian, steward, keeper.  Of what you may well ask.  Of other people's stuff!  

This is one of the sneakiest yet effective ways some purge.  They pass their extra possessions on to you under the guise of a gift.  Aha!  Now maybe you are seeing some of your items for what they really are.  
Take for example the tea towels that belonged to grandma, the huge dining room set from the 50's that was your aunt's wedding gift (and not your favourite aunt I might add), the old passports or costume jewellery of yesteryear.  How did it end up at your place, taking up your living space, becoming part of your legacy?  

Some of it you may actually love, like or use.  Other items may have ended up at your house in your care in more subtle ways.  Again, guilt by default - our culture's go to emotion that bears a lot of responsibility for our reactions.  Italicized because there is a clear distinction between action and reaction.  We have the choice.

Another friend or well meaning relative thought this item was so 'you'.  It's part of a set.  You may only use one piece of the set or a few but the complete 50 pieces take up 2 shelves of your limited cupboard space.  Another classic - Person X passed it on to me and they thought it was so cute  - so in homage to the cuteness - they gave it to YOU!!  All very well meaning and kind but bottom line - now you have to find space for it.  Why?  Because otherwise you'll feel bad and you feel it is expected of you. After all, you have become the keeper.  

Okay, enough.  Now we have uncovered the hows and whys to our dilemma.  What are we going to do about it?  Mentally separate yourself from the object for the sake of this exercise.  Put it in the middle of the room, on the floor or table.  If you saw it in a shop window or at a friend's place would it be a show stopper?  Would you walk on by, maybe appreciating it for what it is but not necessarily feel the need to acquire it.  Or is it something you would think about in the following days and regret not having?  

Here is a trick I have used many times.  It came about when we were moving from France to Canada.  We were very limited as to space for shipping our possessions due to expense so we really had to make judicious choices.  During my initial sort there were things I felt were non negotiable, of course I would ship them.  But alas, money has a cruel way of slamming you back down to earth.  

So then as the purge and sort continued I started putting a lone item that I felt I couldn't live without in the middle of the floor in the main (only) hallway in our flat.  Every time we had to go to another room, we had to walk around it or over it - tres annoying.  But it quickly helped me discover just how much or not this item meant to me.  I left it there for at least a day.  If I was truly attached to it, I found a safe place for it so as not to damage it.  If after seeing it over and over in the middle of the space it just got on my nerves I would realize that it could go.  You get sick of inconvenience very quickly so you are spurred on to reduce the aggravation.  If the object only served to irritate me after walking around if a few times then I  knew I could live without it and still have a fulfilling existence.

Of course, this strategy worked for me and I still continue to do it sometimes even though we are not moving.  You may do well to think about it and adapt it to your setting.  

Consider the original owner of the item(s).  Wherever they are now or whenever you are reunited with them - do you think this object will be the first thing you talk about?  or the first thing they ask about?  or will it ever even come up?  I seriously doubt it. If it does though, if your relationship is worth its salt, it won't matter.  

You were meant for greater things.  A custodian of other people's random possessions will never be worth it.